You want your children to behave and be happy, but did you know the best research shows that well behaving children are the happiest children, and their parents are happy too. So what is the trick to children behaving? Since the 1960’s parents have been told to use all kinds of methods, techniques, and strategies, but children in the past 50-60 years have NOT been behaving better. These techniques have caused a lot of unhappiness. Having well-behaved children is about attitude, not techniques, and you as the parent can create the right attitude.
First, you make your expectations perfectly clear. Speak in simple sentences. Don’t use 20 words when seven will do. Longer sentences make you sound weak.
Second, start your commands with strong statements like “I want you to…” and “It’s time to…” You say, “It’s time to brush your teeth” or “I want you to put your things away.”
Third, do not explain your reasons. Explanations just beg for arguments. When your child asks why or why not, you must say, “Because I said so.” These four words help your child understand authority, and they let your child relax without anxiety. It’s just a fact, so never raise your voice to say it. Yelling undermines your authority. Your authority is the key to having obedient children and a happy home.
Lastly, you never get down to a child’s level when you talk with a child. When your child looks up to you, he or she is learning respect for your authority. Stand up at your full height, and he or she will want to be a grown-up too, not a perpetual adolescent. Your child will be well-behaved if he knows you’re the authority, and you will enjoy a happier home.
Family psychologist John Rosemond originated these thoughts about child raising.